Here is the answer to the million dollar question. 🤑🤑 $$$ I didn’t figure it out until I was 40, and damn do I wish I knew it when I was a young 20 Something Puma. I am here to save you years of time figuring this out. Listen in girls, it is really SO simple. The Big Question is, what do men really want? How many times have we all heard the phrase, “All men want is sex?” Why are some men interested in some women over others? The golden answer is that of course it has to go beyond looks, even though looks are critical to these visual animals. It has to dive deeper into what men are really looking for in a long-term partner.
Here is my list of the 6 most important things high quality guys look for in a woman outside of sex.
1. He Wants To Be Extremely Attracted To You
I want to take this one first and head on: men want to be attracted to you and being attractive has a HUGE impact on men. I realize some of you will get angry for me for emphasizing this but it’s true and I want you to be as successful as possible. This is an important opportunity for you. Just remember, I am only asking you to be the most attractive version of yourself. This world is full with many different types of men who all have different types of taste with what they will find attractive. By being the most attractive version of yourself, you are maximizing your options and your power to attract the men you ultimately want to attract. How can you best put your energy into being the best version of yourself? #EXTRA EASY!!! Put effort into the clothes you are wearing and make sure they are both flattering and what makes you feel sexy. Make sure you are in your best shape, whatever that means to you. Focus on the things that make you feel the best about yourself. This positive self image goes a long, long way.
2. He Wants A Woman With A Great Vibe
OK so obvi, duh, looks alone do not make a sustainable relationship. I cannot emphasize this enough. Men LOVE cool girls. Being cool will instantly put you in Tier 1. Your VIBE is the foundation of your attractiveness and is everything in your relationships to other people. It’s the mood and character of another person. Your vibe is the MOST important aspect of how a man or anyone else responds to you. So your vibe grows from your mood it’s an extension of how you are feeling at that given moment. If you’re in a good mood then your vibe will be good. If you are in a nasty bad mood then everyone will see your poisonous resting bitch face and flee. Complaining about your life? Flee. Voicing negativity? Flee. Bore Snore? Flee. Stiff as a board? Flee. No fun zone? Flee. For guys, your vibe is more important then even how great your bod is. Your vibe determines whether it feels good to be around you or not. Men’s feelings are 100% controlled by the feelings they have when they are around you. Trust me, men rarely evaluate women by thinking about the future with them. If he feels good when he’s around you, then he’s going to be interested in you. He’s going to want to spend time with you, hang out and get to know you better. He will text you, call you and make plans. Be interesting, flirty, and witty. Nothing will stop him from pursuing you.. On the other hand, if you have a negative vibe he will avoid you, not answer your texts or calls and stand you up. It will send you straight to the book store self help department for the latest version of “He’s Just Not That Into Me”. This is why vibe is so important. When your vibe is fab, he wants to be around you. When your vibe sucks, instant man repellent.#notaposer#notafake#notuptight
DEFINITION OF A COOL GIRL:
A cool girl is REAL. She is comfortable being herself and doesn’t care how other people view what they say or what they do. They are relaxed, awesome and agreeable. Cool girls have a way of making everyone around them feel cool. It’s why men are drawn to them. She is adaptable. She is sassy. She is fun to be around. She ALWAYS looks good. She mucks in. She is up for a laugh. She is confident. She looks out for herself and her friends. Life is always an adventure to them. They are considered a Unicorn to men.
3. He Wants to Share His Passion With You
This is an easy one. Men are desperately searching for a girl to share his passion with. Every guy is passionate about something. Pay attention when you speak to him it will be easy to discover. It’s the thing he talks about and it seems to change his entire demeanor. BINGO. Now ask him about it. Guys LOVE to share this. They will gush on the subject. Now you will understand so much more about him. This creates a deeper connection to you. He will now think you get him on a deep, deep level. Guys are looking for someone that gets them on this deep level and they don’t easily let go of girls who do.
4. He Wants A Good Listener
This is a good follow up to #3, guys will bond with women who they feel they can share anything with. Sharing and opening up to you is how a guy bonds. They key is developing this close, personal connection. This is how you create intimacy. He notices you’re really listening to him and engaging with what he cares about, which draws him closer to you. There is nothing more important to your long-term chances with a guy then him knowing he can be his true self around you without a hint of judgment. He wants you to be his safe harbor.
5. He Wants A Woman Who Shares His Goals And Dreams
Guys are looking for someone who they know supports them and their direction in life. The best, longest lasting, most compassionate connections have the same values and want the same things out of life. It means your individual goals align and your moving towards them together. Your ideal life visions have to match. For instance, let’s say he really wants to work hard, retire and then spend the rest of his life in his basement man cave while you want to travel the world then you have probably not met your match. You should probably avoid a lot of trouble down the line and say goodbye to Al Bundy.
6. He Wants A Woman He’s Compatible With
Here is the simple definition; compatibility means being in a relationship with each other which feels easy. It is effortless, there is no day to day strain. It’s easy to be around each other and it feels good. If he’s a guy you want to build a future with, make sure you have both attraction and compatibility. One without the other is a train wreck and is called short-term. If your only goal is to hook up, this is totally fine, and is less important.
7. He Wants A Woman He Can Have Great Sex With – Pleeaaase of course I was going to include this!!!
I’m going to give you the honest truth about men. I am not going to lie to you and tell you something different, so you won’t get what you want. SEX is VERY important to men. If you ignore this, you will be in major trouble with your future relationships. Guys really need good sex, the whole menu. Loving sex and loving sex with him will help the relationship tremendously. Sex is the barometer of the relationship. Good sex = good relationship dynamics. Sex promotes a stronger and more positive connection with a partner. These emotional benefits from sex promotes long-term relationship satisfaction. Men see sex as a way to stay close and is always a celebration. Be ready to put on your high heels and your black lace teddy, get a leg over and scream Mazel Tov!
So there you have it, the simple formula to being attractive to the man you want. If you have any questions, or disagree with anything I’ve written, go ahead and drop me a line in the comments. To all the guys out there, let me know if I got this right! I love to talk about this stuff!
Stay EXTRA–
